Home....

Our lives have blended with a modicum of normality now we're home.  Amanda is still in pain, but she's dealing with it.  She takes less breakthrough medication at home than she did at hospice.  Here she can go lie down and be with herself until it subsides.  There is no one to push painkillers her way, she makes the decisions, I just help.  Her once very dexterous aren't working for her due to the root nerve compression in the cervical spine (the neck), this is very frustrating for her.  Plus of course the intense pain down the arms, but she is coping.  All the prayers for healing along with all the positive messages and thoughts from friends and family do help.  They are at times so touching that they bring tears to my eyes.

One such message was from Amanda's uncle who lives in Scarborough.  He posted this touching message on FB after chatting with

Leaving Hospice for Home Sweet Home....

In the end I think the doctors realised the only way they were getting shut of Amanda and I was by providing all the medication we felt was necessary to make home life possible.  This meant, most importantly that we had a 'breakthrough' drug.  Something that if the pain gets totally out of control, we can rely on.  The only thing that worked was a controlled drug (not normally permitted in the community) that had to be administered via a syringe, normally only carried out by a medical professional.... Not me for instance.  I pestered them to allow us to have the breakthrough at home, assuring them I was confident enough to

The Isle of Man Hospice

When we flew back from Clatterbridge (Liverpool) Cancer Centre to the IOM Hospice, the nurses welcomed us back 'Nice to see you again.... Welcome back'.... Lovely welcomes to a place you'd rather not be.  Due to the type of pain Amanda is suffering, managing it is a serious problem.  I have incredible toothache at present, had it a few weeks, but it's just about becoming unbearable at night.  The entire jaw bone aches and throbs.  Anyone who has ever suffered tooth ache or a

Travels cut short....

Long time no hear, I feel you all saying.... Well we've had a lot on our plates.
Travels were cut short due to Amanda suffering an increasing bout of back pain as we travelled our way around India.  When debilitation finally kicked in she decided it was time to head to Bangalore for scans.  After a series of blood, urine and body scans (MRI and PET) over the space of two days, the conclusion was we needed to get home.  The scans showed