Monday 22 August 2011

Retreat into Stillness....

Hi dedicated followers.... all 42 of you, whom I can no longer see as there has been some problem with our BlogSpot followers tab, but I know you're out there, and thank you for that.
Amanda had a lovely week at the Penny Brohn Centre.  She was able to spend time alone, without me in tow, bothering her, constantly mythering her, talking incesantly, poking and prodding.  They had only one day where silence fell upon the group.  Amanda apparently spent most of the silent lunch
 hour trying not to giggle! 
Personally I had ideas of spending every night on a river bank or lakeside, but with work and football it never happened.  I only managed to fish one evening!  Rubbish!
I did miss Amanda terribly, and of course the drone of the juicer..... Robyn arrived home from her drunken partying Summer in Ibiza on Thursday evening, the less said about that the better I think.  She is spending most of the time in bed, whilst Amanda (and me) is being left to sort out all the loans etc for university in a couple of weeks time.  I'd like to see a little more effort on Rob's behalf, but to be honest I should have known better.  Ibiza didn't bring about the changes mentioned in the earlier post, but I'm pretty sure Uni will do the job.  It's funny Robyn went on about how messy everyone was, now the little spare room which is now her bedroom, looks like a bomb has hit a recycling plant... It's disgusting.  Then last night I went into the kitchen and there were hazelnuts just dropped on the floor, and she couldn't be bothered bending down to pick them up to either bin them or put back in the jar (I'd have just ate them).... Nothing has changed!  Ha ha!
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The big news is I've been sacked as principal juicer and supplement provider..... and I miss it.  Amanda told me she wanted to do it for herself.  Empower herself she said, take control of her own day, and not feel reliant on me.  She's aiming to structure her day to tackle Gerson and do her meditation and yoga, and hopefully a little light cardiovascualr exercise too (I should talk!).  I'm having trouble not getting involved, 'keeping my nib out' as Amanda calls it.  I went to make a juice for her yesterday and took a bollocking..... which I didn't understand, as I was just trying to help.  I got up early this morning, even though we both had an awful nights sleep due to the 'across the road screaming baby' again.... it's crazy, I've never heard anything like it.  I wanted to make Amanda's breakfast, do the orange juice etc, but I wasn't allowed.  It's going to take some getting used to.  It's made me feel a little redundant.... useless.... hopefully she will still fall back on me when she needs to.  I know she is stressed at the moment, but it's more to do with getting Rob all sorted out for Uni than anything else.  Stress is the last thing she needs at the moment.

I suppose with the time that my wonderful wife has now freed up for me, I should utilise it wisely to earn us more money, to make things easier.  I may have to go 9 to 5 for a while, in an office.... Oh God, I'm panicking at the thought of it.  Now Amanda is doing the Gerson Therapy on her own, it is an option.  Hmmmmmm, having worked part and full time self employed from home for the past 14 years or so, this could be a struggle..... but needs must, so if I must I will!  If I could find one new client per week that would save me.  But it's finding the people that realise that I can help make them lots more money on their savings, and save them lots of money in other areas.... Something will happen!

The Organic Grocery Stall broke even this week!  Great news, two or three more box orders and we could increase our orders maybe break into profit.  Will have to see on that though!  We are not about to over do it.  The idea was to cover the cost or our organic fruit and veg for the week.  I'm not sure how it will go during late Autumn and the depths of Winter.

Amanda has her heart on moving anyway, so we will have to wait and see what happens on that front.

If I get time this week, between working, revising, football, fishing and preparing fresh meals, (no juicing, so there must be room somewhere, though I have a feeling fishing just took that slot!) I will blog more on the coffee enemas and their contribution to Amanda's improving immune system.

Bye for now x
 

1 comment:

  1. hello again xxxx so happy to hear the trip to the centre was good for Amanda and that her immune system is getting stronger :) oh poor mark,feeling redundant on the juicing, but i bet amanda will get mad with it one day, and you mark will have your place back at the juicer once again. I truelly admire you both so very much; your profound love, commitment, courage, AND knowlege!! i just love it!!! I really dont know another couple like you, and you were both SO made for each other, and it is inspirational!
    I really also KNOW what you are dealing with regarding University and Robyn; not so many years ago Gemma had me 'spinning' with stress trying to get her through clearing at the 'last minute' as she could not be bothered to do it herself!!! I was left to it all, while trying to work etc, not that it mattered to her! ha ha ha! then when I finally got her a place, she lasted less than a year!!! madness! in all fairness, she still done well and got a good job etc, but feel for you there; I dont think Robyn is any different from most girls her age, and she will do really well what ever she choses to do as she has such good role models supporting her - the best - so she cant go wrong!!! Much love to you both, always, and miss you very much, but you are honestly in my thoughts so VERY often. love Woo x x x x x

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