The Results.

Good news. We weren't involved in a major car accident on the way to the hospital, the birds were singing the bees were humming, the sun was blazing. Simply lovely.

We arrived at the hospital, Amanda had her pea sized lump checked. Sally suggested it was just part of the scar tissue, but Dehalvi could take a look next week, just to set her mind at ease.

I made Amanda a cup of green tea, and myself a strong black tea with a splash of milk, and half a teaspoon of sugar. We went into the little side room,
Sally popped the harsh, overhead light on, I asked could I open the blinds instead. As I pulled on the string, rays of sunshine lit the room with a warm glow.
They discussed Amanda's current pain, reiterating the fact that she'd had major surgery a little over two weeks ago. The tendons were tight and the nerves were fraught, in more ways than one.
Cut to the fecking chase I thought. I gulped a mouthful of hot tea. Tea, that was in fact far too hot to be filling my mouth. I had the choice to swallow and burn my oesophagus from top to bottom, or spray Sally in the face with PG's finest. As I swallowed I winced.
'Ok' she said. About bloody time I thought. Better be good Sally.
'It's not the news you wanted'..... echoed in my ears over and over. I reached for Amanda's hand.
We looked at one another briefly, with crooked disappointed expressions. No tears, just disappointment. I think we had prepared our own minds for whatever news was given.
Out of the four nodes taken (Dehalvi said he'd taken 6) one had cancerous cells present.
Good news! Only one had cancerous cells present. Positive spin? Yes, maybe. Why be negative. She could have said you're bloody riddled, nothing we can do, on your way love.
The tumour was 23mm in diameter, with another 10mm of 'bad to be' cells surrounding it.
What's next? Sally went on to offer the full menu, everything they had on offer to eradicate any cancer cells that may, or may not be present in the body. The cancer scored 6 out of 8 on the Oestrogen stimulated scoreboard. Bye bye booze! It was also positive for HER2 (another receptor that stimulates the growth of cancer cells in Amanda's body). They offered Amanda the nausea inducing, follicle smashing, immune system smothering, menopause accelerating bumper pack. The whole conventional cancer fighting menu in it's entirity.
Once Sally finished selling the treatment, Amanda kicked in with a three thousand word retort, on other ways, alternatives, studies that have been proved, people that have self healed through various methods. Her passion was incredible. Mid way through Amanda looked at me, and asked if I was alright, her face was rigid, almost angry (she later told me, had she seen me whimpering or sobbing, or my answer had been, no, she'd have asked me to leave the room! Little minx!), I replied, 'yeh, fine.' Lucky eh? Sally couldn't really argue, as Amanda rightly pointed out, there was no proof against these methods that had worked for other people, for the ones brave enough to try. I know for one I'm not. I would head conventional every time.... probably. There are lots of stories out there. There are many blogs like ours, where people are fighting cancer alternatively.


We drove out to Farnborough Hall, took a long walk, lay in a field with the sunshine on our faces, listened to the birds singing, watched the butterflies fluttering, and chatted about how Amanda wanted to tackle this. Basically we know as much as they do at this current time. There may be no cancer in Amanda's body whatsoever now, they know no more than we do. But they are willing, as a precaution, to flood her system with various medications, that have a plethora of side effects. Amanda is doing it her way. Organic, vegan and raw. With lots of meditation and soul searching.
If you've ever heard her talk about this sort of thing, you will be transfixed. Her faith, passion and commitment is thought provoking. I will support her all the way.
As we came back into town Amanda said we should go to the Easington, sit in the beer garden. She had a still water, I had a cool, crisp, delicious pint of Fosters..... Amanda began chatting again.
Do you know what her main worry was? What was causing her the most anxiety (which she doesn't need right now)? It was having to explain, to fight against her friends and family over what she wants to do, how she wants to take this thing on. Madness I told her.
I would like you all to show her your full support, love and encouragement, get right behind her in this. It's Amanda's life, these are her decisions. They are decisions she hasn't made lightly. She has read tonnes and tonnes on all the conventional treatments, as well as the alternatives. It's not as though she is just throwing the towel in, she wants to live a happy full life. She is going for it with gusto, just on a different route to the conventional one. Like Amanda said, whilst we were walking today, she is so against having her body flooded with medication, the fact she doesn't believe it will benefit her, and will simply make matters worse, will make her depressed and anxious. This will not assist the healing process whatsoever. The fact that she believes in the alternatives, and has such faith, will at least make her mentally strong, therefore ensuring the physical effort is put in.
We are not there to fight or tell her what's right and wrong. What knowledge do we have that outweighs hers? None. Not even the doctors, surgeons and nurses provide any guarantees, nothing.... this may work, this may not work. Well that's the same with Amanda's approach.

I will never tell her what she is doing is wrong, she is doing it because she believes this approach will get her back to full health. Her life isn't my life to command and control, I am simply lucky that I get to share my life with her, as I'm sure you'll agree, we all are.
Stay positive, no tears, they are totally unnecessary... Smile and think of Amanda constantly eating and drinking raw fruit and veg! She says 'Thanks' to everyone who is following and supporting her cause. She doesn't want lots of phone calls and texts, but will check the blog daily for messages, and will leave messages too x